I’m sitting in my favorite coffee shop which I’m going to gatekeep because I’m allowed to do that. I’m thinking about how much I’ve been doing lately. I’ve been doing a lot. I just got off the phone with my dad, and he had several questions for me about what I’m doing and what I’m working on and how I’m doing in general.
I have a lot going on. I’m so happy. I’m so overwhelmed. I’m so underwhelmed. I need to slow down, but there’s always more I can be doing. I went to sleep past my bedtime every night this week. I sent my editor the interview I had due for the magazine at 10:41 PM and then couldn’t stop thinking about it as I was falling asleep so I kept pulling out my phone to make edits in the middle of the night. I still don’t think it’s good enough. I think it’s coming out today. I’m honestly not sure. Sam FaceTimed me in the middle of the night while I was editing my interview and he was editing photos and I guess this is what I wished for 2 years ago when I said I wanted a creative pursuit other than my full-time job. Editing things in the middle of the night.
We talk about how euphoric it will feel not to want anything one day. Part of me is fully aware that I have it all and I have everything I’ve ever wanted and I don’t need anything more than this. I say this to Sam. We keep going back and forth about how amazing this is and how frustrating this is. To be so happy but to be so busy. There’s no time to process anything. Just keep saying yes.
Jack called me on my way to the coffee shop about an hour ago and asked if I’ll bake a cake for one of his clients on Tuesday. I immediately said yes. No use in thinking about it. Yes yes yes. Yes to everything.
Yes, I’ll be at your housewarming party.
Yes, I’ll be at your album release show.
Yes, I’ll interview your client about their upcoming EP and do it for free.
Yes, I’ll set up a meeting for Monday morning before our other meeting on Monday morning to make sure we have everything ready for Monday morning.
Yes, I’ll be at your birthday dinner.
Yes, I’ll bake a cake to bring to your birthday dinner.
Yes, I’ll make the reservation for your birthday dinner and also call the restaurant ahead of time to make sure we can sit at table 24 which is your favorite table and I don’t even know why I know that but it’s probably because I talk to everyone and ask questions and listen to the answers and remember things that most other people don’t remember.
Yes, I’ll refer you for a job at The Company even though we’ve never met and you see on my LinkedIn that I was in Theta but little do you know I dropped out of my sorority because I hated the idea of anyone telling me what to do and what to post and how to act.
Yes, I’ll keep my Substack free even though thousands of writers make tons of money from this but I would probably feel bad charging people to read my work because I still don’t take myself seriously as a writer even though I have several people telling me they’ll buy my book if I write one.
Yes, I’ll write a joint Substack post with you because I think it will be beneficial for both of us even though I’ll probably do it at the last minute because I’m so busy interviewing musicians and doing Pilates and going to Wegmans to buy groceries at 7:30 AM because there are many weeks where that’s the only time I have to grocery shop.
Yes, I’ll probably feel guilty that this reads like complaining even though it’s not and I’m so grateful for my life and I’m allowed to write whatever I want but art is subjective.
I’m eating my frog. It’ll pay off in the long run.
“Eat the frog” is a term used by Corporate America (another thing I’m involved with), and it’s defined as the following:
Eat the Frog is a productivity method in which you identify your most important task for the day — the one you're likely to procrastinate on — and complete it. (Todoist)
This week was a big Eating My Frog week. I did Too Much. I’m acknowledging that, but I need to keep doing Too Much in order to one day be able to not do anything. Right? Does that make sense? I need to do Too Much right now because then one day I’ll be able to pick my kids up from school instead of the babysitter.
I’m not going to read this before I publish it because then I won’t publish it. Last night after dinner, we were walking through the Village and decided it’s a low-stakes fall. I don’t have time to read this anyway because I have a call in 4 minutes with a girl who emailed me about doing some event with some thing or whatever.
Bon appetit.
Learn to say “No!” just not to your mother.
me reading this alone from the restaurant reservation i refused to cancel because one day im not going to be able to go to dinner alone on friday at 5 PM