August Is Not the End

I've reframed my thinking.

I used to dread August. As a kid who loved summer so much, the first day of August meant the beginning to the end of my freedom and childlike wonder, a halt to my happiness and a symbol of the imminent return to evenings crammed with homework and dance class and lacrosse practice and test anxiety and rushed dinners and a poor sleep cycle. For so many years, August was my least favorite month of the year and Sunday was my least favorite day of the week. I think that as a kid, I was constantly stressed about schoolwork and grades without really understanding the total implications on my mental health. I went to a relatively competitive grade school which held its honor students to a certain standard of needing to perform well on the entrance exam to the private high school in our area. In 7th grade, I vividly remember doing homework for 3-5 hours a night every night. Looking back, I’m thinking and for what ????? I feel I would’ve turned out the same without all of that. Maybe I’d have written a book by now.

Last night, I attended my first Substack bestsellers event, and as expected, it was pure magic. I showed up to Brooklyn Crab alone and split an Uber home with two new friends. I talked to strangers about their writing and about my writing and about New York and imposter syndrome and how hard it can be to meet people and how easy it can be to meet people. I met someone who within 5 minutes of talking to me said, “You seem very social. Do you ever get burnt out?” to which I laughed and replied, “I wrote a whole essay about that.” I learned new things and made new connections and went to a new neighborhood (I mean I’ve been to the IKEA in Red Hook but that’s it) and sweat through my new dress. I think that’s what August should be about—trying new things and being outside and exploring the unfamiliar. I left feeling inspired and eager to write more.

I’m having a lot of fun lately. I feel more like myself than ever.

A lot of people at the event last night asked me what I write about, and I think I answered something different every time. I think I write about everything. Sometimes I feel like I write about nothing, but then I see how my writing resonates with people and I feel supported. Anyway, here are some things I’m loving this August. I guess that’s what I’m writing about today.

Judy Blume Essentials (boxed set)
I missed out on reading Judy Blume’s books as a kid (probably because of all that homework I was doing), so Anne and I decided to order ourselves boxed sets of Blume’s work from Jeff Bezos’ online boutique (which I NEVER order books from, but he got me with the Judy Blume boxed set). This morning, I finished Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret, and it was the best possible start to my weekend. We must—we must—we must increase our bust!

UNIQLO wide straight jeans
Many of you know I am on the incessant journey to find Pants That Fit Me. On Wednesday, I took a mid-afternoon coffee break at the office and came back to my desk with $80-worth of clothes from UNIQLO and did a shopping haul for Katherine. I Love My Life at Hudson Yards Tuesday through Thursdays.

Izzy’s latest post on here
Izzy, I love you and that was my favorite thing you’ve ever written.

The cookie I just ate at the café I’m writing from right now
My most prolific writing happens in cafés, and today I’ve chosen Seven Grams Caffé on Varick Street. I ordered a cold brew and a chocolate peanut cookie, and the cookie was fantastic. As someone who bakes a lot, I’m very particular about what constitutes a good cookie, and this one is exceptional. It’s probably a TikTok cookie or something but I don’t have that app so I wouldn’t know.

Puma Speedcat OG Sneakers
As I’ve mentioned before, my mom still buys us “back-to-school shoes” every year, which is one thing I’ve always loved about August. This year I’ve chosen Puma Speedcats and they’ll be arriving to my desk on Tuesday which might be controversial because I work in Big Sneaker, but it’s fine.

Amaya by Aliya Abs
I stumbled upon this oil painting by Aliya Abs last week and haven’t stopped thinking about it. I would do anything to have her on my wall. She’s me.

Vintage pink rotary phone
Last week I had the pleasure of being a guest curator for Nora’s Substack Thanks it’s from eBay. Something on my wishlist right now is a pink rotary landline for my apartment. This morning, while enjoying my coffee and a book on my blue velvet sofa, I called Valerie from my iPhone, and it felt very unchic. (See also: Your phone is why you don’t feel sexy) Had I called Valerie from a pink rotary phone, our phone call would have been 10x more fabulous. I’m looking into this.

COACH Brooklyn Shoulder Bag 39
*Charli voice* Okay okay .. okay okay okay .. here we go
THIS IS THE BEST BAG EVERRRRRR. This is my work bag, my gym bag, my adventure bag, my endless summer bag, my Mary Poppins bag, my 365 Party Girl bag, my everything bag. It’s the best bag I own. The Princess of Nazareth Bella Hadid owns it too, so why don’t you? (This is not an ad.)

My apartment
I really love my home. I really do.

This picture I took of the Sabrina Carpenter church in Greenpoint the other night
This is how I want August to feel—whimsical and blurry and spiritual and free.

Enjoy this month. It’s the beginning! x